-one of the more frustrating symptoms of BPD is constant mood swings

-all it takes is one single event to send our minds reeling in a totally new emotional direction

-those who struggle with BPD find their moods rocketing to extremes and experiencing this reality all day, every day

-it can be exhausting to experience rage, happiness, despair, and mania all in a single hour (or less)

-mood swings may be genetic, caused by stressful childhood environments, or by dysfunction in certain regions of the brain

-environmental triggers are triggers that caused by events and people in their lives, triggers are mainly interpersonal or environmental

-neuroimaging has measured that specific areas of the brain appear differently with BPD than in typical brains, the amygdala (which is responsible for regulating emotions) and the hippocampus (which allows us to regulate our behavior) are affected

-mood swings may be caused by a lack of coping skills

-mood swings can be pervasive, severe, and exhausting

-DBT (dialectical behavior therapy) has been shown to reduce symptoms in about 81% of study participants

-mindfulness can help with mood swings

-medications may also be helpful

1 We are not untreatable

-people with BPD are often considered high-risk because of self-harming and suicidal behavior, in reality BPD has one of the most thorough and successful treatments, DBT. using a foundation of mindfulness and living in the moment, skills taught in DBT are emotion regulation, interpersonal effectiveness, and distress tolerance

2 We can have stable, loving relationships, romantic and otherwise

-regardless of whether someone has a personality disorder diagnosis, human beings crave belonging and validation, wanting to be understood and accepted

3 BPD is an emotional regulation disorder

-that means it’s hard to regulate your emotions to be effective in work or relationships, with therapy we can learn healthy coping skills to deal with our intense emotional arousal, imagine sending a text and waiting for a response, and you get anxiety while waiting for the response, if you imagine that feeling multiplied in intensity and happening frequently throughout the day, it gives you a small glimpse into how painful it can be to have BPD

4 We don’t self-harm for attention

-it’s because we don’t have the coping mechanisms to deal with our pain in a healthy and productive way, we are in intense emotional pain and we don’t know how to express it, a lot of people don’t understand the high emotional pain that comes with BPD

5 We are not manipulative, and we don’t purposefully try to hurt others

-sometimes we simply lack the skills or coping mechanisms to explain what it is that we need, we often don’t realize how we’re affecting the environment

6 We are doing our best (and we know you are too)

-living with BPD is not easy, and we understand it can be difficult for those who suffer as well as for those who love someone with BPD, we really appreciate your support

7 Having BPD can be very isolating

-because of the stigma associated with our disorder, we often feel very alone, it can be difficult for us to speak up when we’re experiencing an intense emotion because we are afraid someone will think we are being irrational, if we’re distant or push you away, it’s not because we don’t love you, it’s because we are trying to cope in the best way we can

8 BPD looks different on everyone

-BPD is pretty individualized in how it presents, we all experience it differently

9 We are so much more than our diagnosis

-there are a lot of strengths in people with BPD, we are very kind, very caring, very loving, we are also brilliant listeners

-be more expressive-record your feelings and thoughts for later reflection

-when you’re feeling particularly lonely, spend some time putting your thoughts and feelings into words

-start a journal

-come back to your journal for later reflection

-become active and focus on your body, take a jog around the block, join a gym, jump rope

-force yourself out of the house and move your body, can do wonders to clear your head and improve your mood

-find means of support-use forums and discussion groups to interact with others, look for online groups focused on emotional well-being, self-improvement, or join groups about books, hobbies, etc

-be more selfless-volunteer in your community, help yourself by helping others, focus on others instead of yourself, helps boost your self-esteem and feel more positive about your loneliness

-be honest with yourself and others-open up to the people closest to you about your feelings, share what you’re going through

-mindfulness meditation training can help people with BPD to feel less “stuck” in their emotions, and less judgemental of the emotions and themselves

-mindfulness meditation-staying in the present moment without judging others and being very deliberate

-you work on being aware of things happening outside of yourself

-mindfulness is a concept that comes from the Buddhist spiritual tradition

-people with BPD not only experience intense emotions, but become “stuck” in these emotions, and judge themselves and the emotions, unfortunately this can end up making the emotion feel even more intense. judgemental thoughts can add other emotions to the mix

-if you experience symptoms of BPD, you may feel like every day is a struggle against your emotional ups and downs

-feeling sad, lonely, and depressed-confide in someone you trust, look after your physical health and hygiene, find activities that you enjoy and find relaxing, create a resilience list-watch tv, massage, write negative feelings on a piece of paper and tear it up, listen to an uplifting song, keep a mood diary, reach out to a mental health professional

-feeling anxious, tense, and panicky-anxiety occurs in times of fear which include stress, embarassment, criticism, and rejection. in a period of intense fear, panic attacks can appear unexpectedly and suddenly. what you can do to get through-confide in someone you trust, look after your physical health, hot drinks, practice breathing exercises, do a reality checklist-list of everything that marks where you are right now, take warm bath or shower, acknowledge your symptoms, keep a diary, reach out to a mental health professional

-dissociation and spaced out-dissociation becomes a problem when it interferes with your daily life or leads to risky behavior, to get through it-look after your physical health, keep a journal, visualize safe places, practice grounding techniques-chew a piece of ginger or chili, clap your hands, drink ice cold water, walk barefoot, do a reality checklist-write down or say time and date, notify those around you what to do in a crisis

-angry outbursts and prolonged frustrations-anger is a normal human emotion, however, if uncontrolled or persistent, it can be destructive and this can be frustrating and frightening for you and those around you, what you can do to get through it-identify triggers, look for warning signs in your body, give yourself time to think, try “cool down” techniques-breathe slowly, rip up newspaper, hit a pillow, use your imagination, control your thinking by cognitive restructuring, problem-solving, better communication, humor, practice anger management skills, eat, sleep, and exercise well

-emotional distress-people with BPD spend a lot of energy fighting emotional dysregulation, accepting your emotional responses means to stop fighting, avoiding, or supressing or denying your feelings, and therefore reducing their power of overwhelming your rational thinking, observe your emotions from the outside, watch your emotions come and go, tune into bodily sensations that come with emotions, tell yourself that you accept the emotions you feel, remind yourself that just because you’re feeling something dosen’t mean it’s reality

-effective communication-expressing yourself to others can sometimes be challenging, reading verbal and non-verbal language can be difficult with BPD, practice beginning with being clear and open about your own thoughts and feelings to maintain good relationships with others

-the inability to gauge the emotions of others and then regulate their own is what makes BPD challenging

What happens when things go wrong?

How does this person react?

-you may find yourself in the position of having to be the voice of reason as you try to get the individual to calm down

-the loss of emotional control seems to occur most often in situations involving other people. you may be berated, cajoled, and criticized for a supposed emotional slight, you wonder if there’s any chance of helping this person gain some self-control

-people with BPD often provoke anger and rejection in those they care about most. however they can also suffer when they’re in ordinary social situations

-“interpersonal contexts are the most common and most potent triggers of emotions,” moreover “difficulties in the ability to modulate or tolerate emotions is a transdiagnostic feature of psychopathology. Therefore it makes sense that Interpersonal Emotional Regulation could provide the key to understanding forms of psychopathology, including BPD, where emotional turmoil plays such a central role

-in contrast to those who lack emotional control, when distressed, people high in IER are able to engage in stress-busting strategies such as seeking social support and sympathy from the important people in their lives. they can tell people how they’re feeling in a calm and non-accusatory manner

-another adaptive IER strategy is the use of problem-solving to deal with an emotionally upsetting situation, getting practical advice is yet another known coping strategy that can both make people feel better and resolve difficult situations

-by contrast, people with BPD engage in maladaptive IER strategies that don’t reduce their distress, but only make it worse. excessive reassurance seeking is one of them. short-term, seeking reassurance may alleviate your distress, which only serves to reinforce your use of it. however, as an interpersonal strategy, it is draining on those people who constantly help to put you out of your emotional misery

-a second maladaptive IER strategy is venting, in which you try to make yourself feel better by letting it all out in the form of shouting and yelling. as an IER approach it won’t help, but will just make you more isolated and unhappy

-one of the reasons why people with BPD become such poor regulators of emotions is that they grew up in situations where their intense expression of emotions, such as venting, was reinforced by those caring for them. although they may have been largely ignored, their caregivers may have occasionally tried to soothe them when they got out of control. this intermittent pattern of reinforcement strengthened the venting behavior, leading these individuals as adults to continue their outbursts when they’re upset at other people

-“Intrinsic IER”-the process of regulating your own emotions rather than the emotions of someone else

-“DIRE”-difficulties in interpersonal regulation of emotions

-the “DIRE” scale breaks down into four proposed factors-maladaptive ones-venting and reassurance seeking, adaptive-avoidance, and acceptance

Things to do to feel better-

-raise your voice or complain to the person in charge

-distract yourself from how you are feeling

-complain to co-workers about how unfair the situation is

-simply notice your feelings

-avoid showing or feeling your distress

-keep contacting friends and loved ones

-keep asking for reassurance

-adapt a healthy rhythm and diet-it positively affects your mood and emotion regulation, sleep and eat at set times, reduces the severity of an emotional response

-pay attention to how you feel-people with BPD usually have trouble recognizing their own emotions and figuring out where these emotions are coming from, a good way to practice is to close your eyes and ask yourself “how have i been feeling these past two hours?” if you notice tension in your body, ask yourself where it came from, where are these feelings coming from, and try not to judge yourself for feeling the way you do

-recognize which emotions came first-people with BPD usually get overwhelmed by their emotions, being overwhelmed by emotions makes it more difficult to calm down, try and analyze your emotions-why did you get upset in the first place? which emotions? which thoughts? by analyzing situations it’s easier to identify which emotion belongs to which thought or feeling, this will calm you down more easily

-increase tolerance of uncertainty levels-people who have difficulty dealing with worry and panic more and sooner about topics that may not be worth it, people with low tolerance of uncertainty levels will try to find explanations, unfortunately intolerance of uncertainty, in combination with the fear of (potential) abandonment is a deadly combination for panic, worry, and getting emotionally overwhelmed, often this combination makes people with BPD think of how their partner is leaving or cheating on them. what can you do about it? write down possible explanations, rate them according to likelihood, another tip-figure out your worst fear and testing if that fear is true, coping with BPD means you need to test certain hypotheses that cause you to panic, worry excessively, or makes you feel depressed, this way you’ll see that most of your fears are unrealistic and not true

-use self-talk in a positive way-have somebody who loves you list ten things they appreciate or love about you, which characteristics make you unique in a positive way, self-talk makes people in general feel more positive about themselves

-don’t respond to others immediately-responding immediately to someone’s comment, email, or question significantly increases the likelihood that you’ll respond out of emotion rather than common sense, an emotional response is often driven by personal needs, desires, or fears, it’s these needs, desires, and fears that can lead to a lot of false assumptions and miscommunication issues, build in a delay-sometimes it works well to repeat the question before they answer it, to ask the person if they understood you correctly before you answer, to ask themselves if the answer you want to give them is emotionally charged, try to come up with an alternative response, one that is not emotionally charged, always wait a week before you make life-changing decisions, and talk about it with people you trust, and take their opinions seriously, and last but not least analyze your own feelings

-analyze your own feelings-it’s difficult for people with BPD to identify their own feelings, coping with BPD becomes easier when you can identify your own feelings, try to figure out where these emotions are coming from, by taking away certain triggers you make it easier on yourself.

-find some self-soothing activities/behaviors-coping with BPD requires effort, time, and patience, need to kill time when you are nervous or anxious, self-soothing activities or behaviors can literally be anything that dosen’t harm you or others around you

-expose yourself to difficult experiences-thinking of difficult experiences brings up negative feelings and emotions, usually people try to avoid these, however, by exposing yourself to these difficult experiences, these negative feelings and emotions become less intense, you don’t act upon these feelings, try to accept these feelings as they are, you’ll see that they will fade away after 15 minutes or so

-coping with BPD isn’t something that can be done now and then, it’s a full-time job that requires persistence, patience, and a lot of practice

1. Discouraged BPD-

-impairments in self-functioning, unstable or poor self-image, chronic feelings of emptiness, instability in goals, values, career plans, or general aspirations

-impairments in interpersonal functioning

-loyalty, even to an excessive degree

-pliant and easily swayed by others, even when it goes against one’s own desires

-submissive and passive, even when desiring a leading role

-humble as a result of low self-esteem, insecurity, and vulnerability

-constant feelings of vulnerability and weakness

-constant feelings of being in jeapordy

-feeling hopeless, helpless, powerless, and depressed

-excessive dependence on others

-tearful episodes

-feelings of emptiness

-self-persecution and self-victimization, believing others are constantly attacking

-destruction or intentional loss of belongings

-reliance on fantasy as a means to escape

-chronic or recurring illness complaints, sometimes somatic

-self-deprivation-rooted in feelings of worthlessness

-substance abuse

2. Impulsive BPD-

-most charismatic of the four types

-has much in common with histrionic personality disorder

-flirtacious with others, sometimes without realizing it

-captivating, able to act with a natural magnbetism

-elusive and mercurial

-superficial. easily entertain others on a surface level but avoid more meaningful interactions and relationships

-high levels of energy, easily bored

-thrill-seeking and risk-taking behaviors without regard for consequences

-attention-seeking behavior

-charismatic and charming

-dramatic

-highly manipulative

-complaints of chronic or recurring illness

3. Petulant Borderline

-an inability to express feelings

-outbursts of anger

-feelings of being unworthy or unloved

-socially anxious

-extreme fear of abandonment

-a need to control others

-experience dissatisfaction in relationships

-co-occuring disorders

-paranoia in relationships

-self-harm tendencies

-intense mood swings

-poses ultimatums in relationships

-“proving” that someone dosen’t love them

-constantly searching for validation

-push and pull in relationships

-wanting others to feel guilty for their actions, or lack of actions

-negative

-passive-aggressive

-shutting others out of their lives

-uses suicidal behavior to control others

4. Self-destructive Borderline

-intense feelings of self-loathing (self-hatred)

-prone to self-harm

-often depressed

-feelings of bitterness

-look for comfort through attention from others

-suicidal behaviors

-self-injurous behaviors

-substance abuse

-engage in reckless behaviors out of lack of self-care

-tend to sabotage their own happiness and well-being due to feelings of being undeserving

-unstable self-image (lack of identity)

-believes no one cares about them so they don’t care about themselves

-unstable emotions

Symptoms of BPD-

-Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment

-Patterns of intense, unstable interpersonal relationships characterized by alternating between extreme variances of idealization and devaluation

-Identity disturbance, markedly and persistent unstable self-image or sense of self

-Impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging (i.e. overspending, promiscuous sex, substance abuse, reckless driving, binge eating)

-Recurrent suicidal behavior, gestures, threats, or self-mutilating behavior

-Affective instability due to a marked reactivity of mood (i.e. intense episodic dysphoria, irritability, or anxiety)

-Chronic feelings of emptiness

-Inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger

-Transient, stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative symptoms

Associated Features of BPD-

-one of the most prominent features is instability in interpersonal relationships, self-image, and affects

-severe instability can be seen in their fluctuating view of him or herself, they often feel really good about themselves and their progress and then a seemingly minor experience turns their world upside down

-marked impulsivity

-people with BPD will often give up on something just before the goal is attained

-often difficult to maintain relationships, a job, or educational goals, since their basic instability extends to work and school

-psychotic-like symptoms may occur when they are under stress, including hallucinations, body-image distortions, ideas of reference, and hypagogic phenomena

-they don’t do well in personal relationships, if they do have relationships, they are unstable

-risk of suicidal, self-mutilating, or brief psychotic states increases when they are experiencing an emotional state they cannot handle

-also exhibit symptoms of depressive mood disorders, addictions to various things, and anti-social behavior, other comorbid disorders include mood, substance related, eating, ptsd, attention defecit, and other personality disorders

To the sufferer, BPD is about deep feelings, such as-

-if others get to know me, they will find me rejectable and will not love me and will leave me

-I need to have complete control of my feelings otherwise things will go wrong

-I am an evil person and deserve to be punished

-other people are evil and abuse you

-if someone fails to keep a promise, they can no longer be trusted

-if I trust someone I run a great risk of getting hurt or disappointed

-if you refuse someone’s request, you run the risk of losing them

-I will always be alone

-I can’t manage by myself, I need someone to hold back on

-there is no one who really cares about me

-I don’t really know what I want

-I will never get what I want

-I’m powerless and vulnerable

-I have no control of myself

-I can’t discipline myself

-my feelings and opinions are unfounded

BPD traits, organized by thoughts, feelings, and actions-

-Thinking-impaired perception and reasoning

-DSM traits-splitting, brief moments of stress-related paranoia or severe dissociative symptoms

-Feeling-poorly regulated, highly changeable emotions

-DSM traits-intense, unstable moods, strong reactions to shifts in the environment, irritability or anxiety, feelings of acute hopelessness, despair, and unhappiness, frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment, feelings of emptiness and lack of identity

Acting-impulsive behaviors

-DSM traits-innappropriate, intense anger, pain management behaviors such as overspending, suicide, self-harm, substance abuse, etc.

Lower functioning vs. high functioning

lower functioning-

-conventional BPs, acting in mostly self-destructive acts such as self-harm, BPD and associated symptoms make it difficult to live independently, hold a job, manage finances, families often step in to help, self-harm and suicidal tendencies, high interest in therapy

high functioning-

-invisible BPs, acting out in uncontrolled and impulsive rages, criticism, and blame, lack of interpersonal skills, appear normal, even charismatic, but exhibit BPD traits behind closed doors, has a career and may be successful, state of denial, disavow responsibility for relationship difficulties, refuses treatment, may see a therapy but it rarely lasts, concurrent illness, commonly substance abuse disorders or narcissist personality disorder

Substance use among people with BPD-

-often skilled in seeking multiple sources of medications they prefer, such as benzos

-associate drugs with social interactions

-often use substances in a chaotic and unpredictable pattern

-poly drug use is common

-usually have big appetites, often experience powerful emotion-driven needs for something outside of themselves

-when they stop using drugs, they are extraordinarily vulnerable to meeting their needs through compulsive behaviors, such as-

-compulsive sexual behavior

-compulsive gambling

-compulsive spending

Child vs adult presentation

-the DSM is not currently modified to diagnose patients under 18 years old

Gender and cultural differences in presentation-

-BPD is diagnosed mainly in females

-women with BPD are most likely to also have eating disorders

-men with BPD are most likely to also abuse substances

-1 out of every 4 people diagnosed with BPD is male

-men tend not to seek treatment

-BPD affects 1 to 2 percent of the world’s population, but new estimates see the number much larger than that

-about 10% of BPD diagnoses are made in outpatient settings, about 20% of BPD diagnoses are made in inpatient settings

-BPD is five times more commonly diagnosed in first degree relatives of affected persons

-the actual cause of the disorder is unknown

-it is commonly believed that the symptoms are long-lasting

-people with symptoms have a history of unstable relationships, and sexual abuse, physical abuse, or neglect

-serotonin deficiency may be involved in the development of BPD

-or an irregularity of non-adrenaline

-or dopamine, which has also been implicated

-experts differ on whether people with BPD “grow out of it” when they get into their 50s and above

-more research needs to be done on this

Diagnostic Tests for BPD

-the Diagnostic Interview for Borderline Patients (DIB) is the best known “test” for BPD

-the DIB is a semi-structured clinical interview that takes 50 to 90 minutes to administer

-the four areas of functioning that the test includes are-

-affect-chronic/major depression, helplessness, hopelessness, worthlessness, guilt, anger, anxiety, loneliness, boredom, and emptiness

-cognition-odd thinking, unusual perceptions, non-delusional paranoia, quasi-psychosis

-impulse action patterns-substance abuse/dependence, sexual deviance, manipulative, suicidal gestures

-interpersonal relationships-intolerance of aloneness, devaluation, masochism/sadism, demandingness, entitlement

-The Structured Clinical Interview (SCID-II)

-12 groups of questions, relating to the 12 personality disorders

-The Personality Disorders Belief Questionnaire (PDBQ)

-Zanarini Rating Scale for BPD (ZAN-BPD)

-McLean Screening Instrument for BPD (MSI-BPD)

Emprically Supported Treatments

-the best treatment is DBT, designed by Marsha Linehan

-first, life threatening or harmful situations are dealt with

-then they are pushed to experience emotions that are painful to them

-part three addresses living problems

-four, helps the patient feel complete as a person

-Other types of therapies include-

-CBT

-group therapy

-family therapy

-individual therapy

Key Issues and Concerns in the Treatment of BPD-

-slow progress in therapy

-suicidal behavior

-self-injury

-client contracting

-transference and counter-transference

-clear boundaries

-resistance

-subacute withdrawal

-symptom substitution

-somatic complaints

-therapist well-being

Types of Psychotherapy used-

-CBT-cognitive bahvioral therapy

-TFP-transference-focused therapy

-DBT-dialectical behavior therapy

-SFT-schema-focused therapy

-MBT-mentalization-based therapy

Prognosis-

-disorder peaks in young adulthood and frequently stabilizes after age 30

-75% to 80% of BPD patients threaten suicide, between 8 and 10% are successful

-BPD decreases significantly over time, especially for remitted BPD patients

-the most co-occuring personality disorders declined significantly over time, except avoidant, dependent, and self-defeating PDs

Prevention-

-prevention recommendations are scarce

-the disorder may be genetic and not preventable

Medications-

-medication is not recommended as a first-line treatment

-may be useful in treating some symptoms

-naltrexone may be good for relieving physical discomfort of dissociative episodes

neuroleptics-navane, haldol, stelazine, flupenthixol

atypical-zyprexa, abilify, risperdal, clozaril, seroquel

SSRIs-prozac, luvox, zoloft, effexor

mood stabilizers-depakote, lamictal, topamax, tegretol, lithium

Economic Impacts-

-up to 40% of high users of mental health services have BPD

-more than 50% of people with BPD are severly impaired in emloyability, with a resulting burden on SSI, SSD, and medicaid and medicare

-12% of men and 28% of women in prison have BPD

1 BPD often causes symptoms like extreme mood shifts and uncertainty in how a person views themselves and others

-people with BPD have difficulty regulating emotions, unsteady sense of self, and a pattern of intense, unstable relationships, it affects how a person thinks and feels about themselves and others enough to negatively impact their daily life

-people with BPD experience mood shifts so severe they make a person feel overcome by massive waves of emotion, and the stimuli for these extreme emotional reactions can be minor

2 BPD is thought to affect about 2 to 6% of people in the United States

3 People with BPD often have other mental health conditions

-the relationship between BPD and other conditions is not completely understood

-may be negative coping mechanism to deal with the painful symptoms of BPD

4 BPD and Bipolar are not the same thing

-share some similarities, such as bipolar disorder also causes extreme shifts in mood and behavior

-however, with bipolar disorder, the shifts are primarily between depressive, manic, and hypomanic episodes

-fear of abandonment and unstable personal relationships inherent to BPD aren’t in the diagnostic criteria for bipolar

5 People with BPD are at an elevated risk for self-harm and suicide due to a mix of intense emotions and impulsivity

-self-harm, suicidal ideation, and suicidal behavior are more prevalant among people with BPD

-about 10% of people with BPD die by suicide, which is tragically high

-people with BPD may turn to self-harm because it feels like instantaneous relief for heightened emotions

6 There is no single cause of BPD, but experts believe there are several key risk factors involved

-combination of hereditary, neurological, and environmental factors

7 Some experts advocate for diagnosing BPD in adolescents while others prefer to wait until adulthood

-clinicians are discovering that BPD can be detected in children and adolescents, possible signs are impulsive risk-taking, frequent angry outbursts, continuous interpersonal issues, low self-esteem, and repetitive self-injury or suicide attempts

-the earlier we intervene, the more likely we are to help

8 The first-line treatment for BPD is therapy

-we cannot take away people with BPDs emotional reactivity, but we can give them skills to better respond to the emotional reaction

-DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy)-combines acceptance and mindfulness of one’s emotional state with coping skills for these emotions

-CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy)-helps people with BPD identity and manage their emotions and behaviors

9 It can be hard for a person with BPD to trust their therapist, and that bond if often foundational to recovery

-therapists treating BPD typically emphasize acceptance and validation

-group therapy is also good for BPD patients, so they can learn how to best interact with and express themselves to other people

10 There are not any medications specifically recommended to treat BPD

-there simply aren’t yet clear enough benefits to using medications as the primary treatment for BPD

-can only prescribe meds for symptoms

-mood stabilizers for emotional instability

11 BPD is often stigmatized, even among healthcare providers

-some mental health providers hold false and harmful views on BPD

-one of the most pervasive misperceptions is that people with BPD are intentionally maliciously trying to manipulate those around them with their displays of extreme emotion or self-harm. This is false. These symptoms stem from mental illness, not a person deciding of their own volition that they’d like to manipulate other people

12 People with BPD can be empathetic and lovely individuals

-there are serious challenges with extreme sensitivity, but there are also benefits

-people with BPD are often able to understand the feelings of other people to a greater degree

-many people with BPD are unusually creative because they have a deeper and broader experience of human emotion from which to draw

-people with BPD are fun. creative, compassionate, beautiful people

13 With solid therapy and hard work, the long-term outlook for people with BPD can be bright

-remission rates of BPD are incredibly high

-BPD does not have to define you; it’s treatable, and there’s help out there

1 Nothing

2 Aren’t you overreacting?

3 Is that like the woman is Fatal Attraction?

4 But you were happy this morning-what changed?

5 Oh, so you’re bipolar?

6 I’ve heard that BPD is impossible to recover from

7 I would never date a girl with BPD-they’re way too clingy and needy

8 My friend dated a girl with BPD-she was a total slut and cheated on him all the time!

9 You’re not ill, you’re just an attention-seeking asshole!

10 All women are a bit BPD

11 Why have you got scars all over your arms?

12 Do you think about suicide? Have you ever tried it?

13 I heard that everyone with BPD was abused as a child

14 Why can’t you stop (drinking/spending too much/cutting yourself)?

15 My friend has BPD and she never cut herself

16 My mom says…

17 Why do you have to tell people you have BPD?

18 Just don’t worry about it!

19 You’re so emotionally unstable

20 Why can’t you hold down a relationship?

21 You don’t need to get so angry all the time

22 Pull yourself together

23 You’re so stupid

24 It’s like you have two different personalities

25 Stop being so paranoid

26 Do you ever first think about your actions?

27 You are crazy

28 What caused that disorder?

29 There is something seriously wrong with your brain

30 I can’t cope with you and your mood swings

31 Why don’t you have your future figured out already?

32 It’s all in your head

33 Be more positive

34 Are you sure BPD is a real thing?

35 Just snap out of it

36 You like drama

37 You’re acting childish

38 Did you take your medicine?

39 Don’t let it ruin your whole day

40 Stop overthinking everything

41 BPD…isn’t that like bipolar?

42 BPD dosen’t hurt me, you do

43 Self-pity won’t help

44 It’s ALWAYS something with you

45 Why do you make everything about yourself?

46 You must be hard to love

47 You’re too sensitive

48 Get over it

49 You say I love you too much

What people with BPD don’t want to hear-

-I wish people would stop telling me I just need to control my emotions

-That our lives are complete train wrecks and people should steer clear of having relationships with people with BPD

-I wish people would stop saying that people with BPD do it for attention or to be dramatic

-Stop focusing on educating around “surviving” people with BPD! I am not something to survive!

-I wish that BPD didn’t come with such a negative connotation

-I wish there wasn’t such a stigma that we’re all crazy and that we hurt and manipulate others in relationships

-We aren’t just being overdramatic or “brats”

-You don’t have to try to fix my mood. But make it clear you’re still there.

-That I’m too much trouble

-I wish people wouldn’t say that it dosen’t seem like I have BPD

-I wish people would be honest if they don’t understand BPD

-How some people can be compassionate towards people with anxiety or depression but not toward people with personality disorders

-I’m not a manipulative narcissist

-that we’re automatically toxic people because of a diagnosis

-please don’t say to someone with an official BPD diagnosis “I think I have that too” after they explain their disorder

-I hate when people call me crazy